It's a family curse.

[valadilenne]

I have a terrible secret.

I can't stop making Jell-O. It's as if I've all of a sudden realized that vaguely fruit-flavored congealed sugarwater is delicious and I have this nostalgic craving for Jell-O Jigglers. I've put a pan of Jell-O in the fridge to firm over night and then in the morning I'm going to turn a cup upside down and cut circles into the gelatin. If I had a star-shaped cookie cutter, you bet your ass I'd be eating red stars come noon.

This isn't just a thing with regular Jell-O, though. My grandma, being from the Lutheran side of the family, is Really Into Jell-O. She does things with it I would consider blasphemous, being that she peaked in gelatin related activities in about 1957 and hasn't really gone past the whole "olives suspended in lime Jell-O topped with mayonnaise" thing. This is what's known as a Lutheran Funeral Salad, and we eat it every time we show up at her house in Iowa. Yes, when we visit grandma we eat Funeral Salad. I know that's weird, but it's not even dessert to us. It's part of the meal proper.

The one time she served it with these olives I asked her what the little black things were, thinking they were a strange candy. Apparently she took offense at my uneducated ways and the next Christmas I found myself with a Jell-O cookbook to ensure that I knew how to carry on the family tradition. Strangely, there's no such thing as putting celery chunks and other vegetables in the dessert in this cookbook. It's more like using various colored puddings to make ladyfinger cakes and delicious-looking molds.

So help me God if I find myself chucking mandarin oranges and shredded carrots into orange gelatin dessert when I'm 70 I'll know it's time to check out. For right now I'm sticking with the stuff I loved in kindergarten.

Comments

[centennialfowl.livejournal.com]

I'm amazed with the possibilities of jello. We had a bit of it down here, but I think that a lot of the recipes didn't make it south of the Mason-Dixon.

Hey there, Honeybee!

[wisteria-blu.livejournal.com]

I'm snooping around your page, I admit... (I go through people's jewelry boxes,too, just cuz I like to learn their stories. meh. *shrug*) And I had to find out why Jell-O was a tag. I'm so glad to meet another Jell-O person, and I have to add to the Funeral Salad thing (great band name, btw): one of my aunt-in-laws (?) makes a Shrimp & Jell-O Salad. Yes. I'm serious. It's made with Jell-O, cream, tomato soup, onions, peas, celery and shrimp. It's not too bad, but the texture leaves a bit to be desired. *shiver* So yeah, there are braver people than us when it comes to the jiggly stuff. I'll pass on my blueberry Jell-O salad recipe to ya if you want.

Re: Hey there, Honeybee!

[smokingguncafe.livejournal.com]

Wow, I'd forgotten about some of these public entries. You're honestly interested? I'm surprised.

Guhhh, Jell-O needs to stay within the realm of whipped cream and fruit, not to be used as a casserole base substitute. There's even a book (http://www.amazon.com/Gallery-Regrettable-Food-James-Lileks/dp/0609607820/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1238862425&sr=8-1) about using jello as a suspension agent for whole dinners. Meat loaf... in Jell-O. Turkey loaf... in Jell-O. My mom always floats banana slices at the top of cherry Jell-O. I guess she has a better sense of what's dignified than my other relatives.

I haven't made Jell-O in a long time. Law school tends to make it difficult to get around to things like that.